Removal
A short play by Lauren Brigolin
Photos by Zoe Deal
On April 23, 2017, I was introduced to a study by Alexandra Brodsky for the Columbia Journal of Gender and Law. It described a type of sexual assault I had been previously unaware of called “stealthing,” where one partner non-consensually removes a condom during sex without the other person’s knowledge and/or consent.
This 28-page study explores legal responses to non-consensual condom removal through interviews. In her study, Brodasky says, “survivors make clear that, as a result of the removed condoms, they experienced fear of STIs and pregnancy and also a less concrete but deeply felt feeling of violation.”
United States courts have not heard a case with this form of rape, which leaves people confused about what they can do, what has happened and what to call it. However, in January 2017, a Swedish court convicted a man of rape through stealthing and two California and Wisconsin lawmakers are currently working to formally classify stealthing as rape.
I had to find a way to pose the question that Brodasky says many victims ask, “I’m not sure this is rape, but… ” As a journalist and a playwright, this is how Removal came to be.
The play describes a conversation between a mother, Claudia, and her daughter, Leah. The play has been condensed and is meant to be performed on a stage. As you read on, I encourage you to use your imagination to bring to life to a conversation some individuals are struggling to have right now.
CAST
Leah…………………………………………………………… A young woman
Claudia ………………………………………………………… Leah’s mother
Same as last Saturday but everything has changed.
At Rise: LEAH is on her computer and the phone.
She is trying to solve what happened.
Scrolling. Scrolling. Scrolling.
Listening. Listening.
Finally:
LEAH
Well, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Thank you.
LEAH hangs up.
The quietness of knowing
without understanding settles.
CLAUDIA exhumes into the room.
Holding something.
Finally:
CLAUDIA
Leah? What is this?
LEAH
I don’t know.
CLAUDIA
Oh. Well, it kind of looks like a pregnancy stick.
The Mother stares at the mother-to-be.
CLAUDIA
Uh-huh. You know what the curious thing is? There’s a little itty-bitty looking plus sign in it. Annnnd, I know it’s not mine, cause’ I had my tubes tied and unless your father is hiding somethin’? You know, I, I thought we had a pretty open dialogue about sexual stuff, ya know?
LEAH
I know.
CLAUDIA
Should we talk about this?
LEAH
I…
CLAUDIA
Actually, that’s not a question. Let’s talk about this.
LEAH
I took the Plan B pill.
CLAUDIA
Okay. When did you do this?
LEAH
I think the same day?
CLAUDIA
Honey, what happened?
LEAH
I’m figuring that out.
CLAUDIA
Was it with someone you know?
LEAH
Yeah.
CLAUDIA
I’m not pretending to be oblivious, I know you’re sexually active, that’s fine, we talked about that. I mean, asking advice on blow jobs is one thing, but, ya know… Was it Ethan?
LEAH
…
CLAUDIA
Honey, I’m not mad, I’m just confused.
LEAH
I am too.
CLAUDIA
How can I help you?
LEAH
I…
CLAUDIA
It’s okay, that you’re pregnant —
LEAH
I’m not pregnant.
CLAUDIA
Ha, ha. This little thing, tells another story —
LEAH
My period started.
A breath. A moment.
An anomaly in normalcy ceases.
CLAUDIA
Oh. Why, didn’t you start by saying that?
LEAH
Because something else happened.
CLAUDIA
Like what, do you have an STD?
LEAH
They’re called STIs, now.
CLAUDIA
Did Ethan give you HIV?
LEAH
No, no, not —
CLAUDIA
I’m gunna need you to pick up the pace, hun, are you okay?
LEAH
Yes. And, then no, I’m not sure, Mom! I’m trying to figure it out.
CLAUDIA
Okay?
The quietness of not knowing
And needing to understand settles.
Finally:
CLAUDIA
Do you want to talk about it?
LEAH
I think so.
CLAUDIA
It doesn’t have to be with me, we can go to a doctor, or your dad if you want to talk to him.
LEAH
It’s all jumbled; I don’t know where to start…
CLAUDIA
Were you drunk?
LEAH
No, mom.
CLAUDIA
No need to get snippy, I’m just trying to understand.
…
Drugs?
LEAH
No. We were both completely ourselves. Sober.
CLAUDIA
Okay.
LEAH
We… We, well, you know he was the one I’d been, like, sexually active with, sorta?
CLAUDIA
Yeah, blowjobs, handjobs, whatever, but not like sex-sex, right?
LEAH
Yeah.
CLAUDIA
Normal boyfriend-girlfriend stuff.
LEAH
Yeah.
CLAUDIA
Okay.
LEAH
We, we decided. Let’s have sex. We talked about it on and off, but never did it for a while, cause, I don’t know, and then we looked at each other and said, “let’s do it,”
CLAUDIA
So you both agreed to have sex, alright.
LEAH
Kind of?
CLAUDIA
What do you mean, “kind of”? It sounds like a sober and enthusiastic “yes” to me? What happened?
LEAH
It was. We set boundaries. We agreed we’d use a condom, which he had, if one of us said stop, we’d stop. But neither of us said stop.
…
Neither of us said stop.
…
But, he, I don’t know how he did it, but like…
…
He removed the condom?
Deafening silence. An anomaly.
Knowing without understanding suffocates the two.
LEAH
Mom…? I think I was raped.
CLAUDIA
…
LEAH
I, I called the help hotline, but I asked about periods and the plan b pill instead… I didn’t…
CLAUDIA
Sexually assaulted.
LEAH
Raped.
CLAUDIA
But — I’m not saying what you’re feeling is wrong, but… I mean, you agreed to have sex?
LEAH
I know, that’s… I’m confused. But we — I — agreed to have sex with a condom because…
CLAUDIA
STIs, pregnancy…
LEAH
I feel awful inside. I said yes, to sex, but with an agreement that was broken?
CLAUDIA
…
LEAH
And, I was reading online… It’s, it’s this thing called, “Stealthing,” –
CLAUDIA
What is?
LEAH
What he did to me. Removing the condom, it’s called stealthing and I think I was — (raped)
CLAUDIA
Please stop saying that word. It —
LEAH
But that’s what —
CLAUDIA
I know, yes, I hear you; it just makes me uncomfortable to hear that word.
LEAH
I found forums online where men were talking about their stealthing and were sharing tips on how to do without the other person noticing.
CLAUDIA
Okay.
LEAH
And, stuff like, “It’s a man’s right to spread his seed,” —
CLAUDIA
That’s the stupidest shit, I’ve ever heard.
LEAH
I know… I’m sorry.
CLAUDIA
You did nothing wrong. Not a single. Damn. Thing.
LEAH
I didn’t say anything to him after… I didn’t know what happened or what to say.
I just left feeling sick. Mom?
Softer than the sound of moonlight touching the ground: LEAH’s question.
LEAH
Was I raped?
Ten unheard heartbeats pass.
Finally:
CLAUDIA
… I don’t know.
The unanswered End.
—
An abridged version of this script appears in the print edition of EVOLVE.
Editor’s note: This is a work of theater that addresses a very real issue. If you have questions, concerns, or you or someone you know is a victim of sexual violence, help can be found through Western’s Consultation and Sexual Assault Support at 360.650.3700 and Whatcom County’s Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Services at 360.671.5714.